Tough Love: 5 Tips for Getting (and Staying) Fit
Lucia Rapisarda @lucialeighfitness www.lucialeighfitness.com FB/lucia.rapisarda.9
February 6th, 2016
Lucia Rapisarda @lucialeighfitness www.lucialeighfitness.com FB/lucia.rapisarda.9
February 6th, 2016
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When I was 21, I used to think the fittest people I met were born that way. Strolling around the gym with their perfect shoulders, six pack abs, apple-shaped-glutes and… how the hell did they always have perfect hair? This was a breed of human being that I was far too inexperienced to begin to understand. Between genetics and some special sauce hidden from the rest of the world, I didn’t relate to them on any level except when we were in the same place at the same time.
I tried to keep up, but it didn’t help that I hated nearly every exercise machine in the gym; treadmills sucked and row machines didn’t free your hands up to read the current issue of US Weekly. All of the other fit chicks in the gym were reading it so that must’ve been part of a successful regime, right? WRONG. |
What I didn’t understand then, was that fitness wasn’t merely a New Year’s resolution or a passing phase. As much as you may cringe when I say this – fitness is a serious lifestyle choice. Being fit is a total mindset. I know, I know, it can be a totally overwhelming thought, especially when you are endlessly busy and the only cardio you (think) you can squeak out during the day is a scenic walk to the copy machine. Sure, go ahead, get a few more steps in pacing around the coffee machine. But, if you want to commit to a real lifestyle change, you need to step up and stop making excuses. Starting now!
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A lot has changed since my early 20’s. I’ve moved past the anxious judgments of the gym and chose, instead, to become a much more active person as a swimmer, short-stop, runner, marathoner, Tough Mudder finisher, and now a Group Fitness Instructor. You can say fitness has become an intrinsic part of my life, but it doesn’t always come naturally nor do I wake up every day with a totally shredded midsection. I’ve learned from trial and error, multiple injuries, and plain old experience that allowed me to cultivate the non-negotiable Five Fit Tips below.
So, are you ready to make a real change? |
Start with the core!
No matter where you are on your journey to live a FITTER life it’s important to develop a well-rounded set of core practices that keep you honest with yourself. Core mind. Core body. Core spirit. You need to focus on the core first before you can focus on bikini selfies at the beach.
Stop with the resolutions!
Wanting your body and behavior to change at the tick-of-a-clock isn’t realistic and you are setting yourself up to fail. You wouldn’t travel to another country you wanted to live in and upon landing, expect to be welcome as a citizen, would you? Resolutions are merely buying that plane ticket. It’s a long and arduous process to earn that citizenship. But, also an amazing journey. The amount of stress exerted into successfully implementing a full blown lifestyle change can easily hinder progress from the start. But, with the right mindset, plan, direction, and support you can and will succeed.
No matter where you are on your journey to live a FITTER life it’s important to develop a well-rounded set of core practices that keep you honest with yourself. Core mind. Core body. Core spirit. You need to focus on the core first before you can focus on bikini selfies at the beach.
Stop with the resolutions!
Wanting your body and behavior to change at the tick-of-a-clock isn’t realistic and you are setting yourself up to fail. You wouldn’t travel to another country you wanted to live in and upon landing, expect to be welcome as a citizen, would you? Resolutions are merely buying that plane ticket. It’s a long and arduous process to earn that citizenship. But, also an amazing journey. The amount of stress exerted into successfully implementing a full blown lifestyle change can easily hinder progress from the start. But, with the right mindset, plan, direction, and support you can and will succeed.
1. ASK WHY?
Regardless, if your need is to be healthier, fitter, or even more present in your life- reflecting on your motivation to change is a big struggle for most people to face and verbalize. On the surface, we think if we have flat abs and toned arms life would be easier. But why stop there? Let's throw in a bank full of cash and exotic vacations to sweeten the fantasy. At some point, though, we need to move past the fantasy and look for the deeper roots inside us either holding us back or nudging that need for a lifestyle change.
A good place to start is identifying the things in your life that aren’t currently serving you. This can be an incredibly broad range of topics and will take some real introspection. There is only one rule: be honest with yourself!
To start, ask yourself- how fulfilled are you with the following:
If you can identify even one thing then write it down along with the feelings and reasons why it needs to change. Why is it so important to you? What impact will it have on you and those around you? This is a tremendous start. It takes courage to look honestly at what is NOT SERVING YOU.
Regardless, if your need is to be healthier, fitter, or even more present in your life- reflecting on your motivation to change is a big struggle for most people to face and verbalize. On the surface, we think if we have flat abs and toned arms life would be easier. But why stop there? Let's throw in a bank full of cash and exotic vacations to sweeten the fantasy. At some point, though, we need to move past the fantasy and look for the deeper roots inside us either holding us back or nudging that need for a lifestyle change.
A good place to start is identifying the things in your life that aren’t currently serving you. This can be an incredibly broad range of topics and will take some real introspection. There is only one rule: be honest with yourself!
To start, ask yourself- how fulfilled are you with the following:
- Career Path
- Health & Wellness
- Financial Stability
- Employers & Job Culture
- Living & Working Locations
If you can identify even one thing then write it down along with the feelings and reasons why it needs to change. Why is it so important to you? What impact will it have on you and those around you? This is a tremendous start. It takes courage to look honestly at what is NOT SERVING YOU.
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2. SET SMALL GOALS:
YOU are your most important relationship ever. Period. So make that relationship work and grow. It’s all about experimenting and finding something you connect with and that motivates you to say: HELL YES!!
You may not know exactly what that is just yet, but there is fun in the journey of finding out. I didn’t realize how much I loved to do something called a “power jump” until I forced myself to try INSANITY. I have always been a runner; it’s a lifetime passion which also became a comfort zone. After I got injured and went through physical therapy, I was forced to try something else. I learned to be open to new things and resisting the urge to say “I can’t”. Use that fear to drive you forward. Screw the excuses! Just do it and envision yourself doing what you think you can’t.
So, you’ve identified some Why’s of seeking a fitter you. Start a journal. Write down and reassess your efforts every week or month if you are too busy- just be consistent. Doing this will force you to acknowledge what you HAVE or HAVE NOT attempted. There’s no exact science. Until you can find your sweet spot remember: “un-intelligent motion is better than intelligent sitting still” [Thanks Dad!].
Small goals discourage immediate defeat! I couldn’t power jump, push up, or burpee well into the second month of Insanity. My only goal was to finish one workout at a time.
Small goals are subjective depending on your larger goal, but can look something like this:
All of these small goals can make a big difference. If creating a goal list doesn’t seem to work, share with someone really close to you what your goals are. And not just a random friend, choose someone you respect & admire that would crush you to disappoint them.
Also, saying your goals out loud will make it real. If you didn’t say it out loud it's easy to pretend like it didn't happen. Instead, reinforce your commitment loud and proud! Don't let yourself or your accountability partner down by holding it all in.
YOU are your most important relationship ever. Period. So make that relationship work and grow. It’s all about experimenting and finding something you connect with and that motivates you to say: HELL YES!!
You may not know exactly what that is just yet, but there is fun in the journey of finding out. I didn’t realize how much I loved to do something called a “power jump” until I forced myself to try INSANITY. I have always been a runner; it’s a lifetime passion which also became a comfort zone. After I got injured and went through physical therapy, I was forced to try something else. I learned to be open to new things and resisting the urge to say “I can’t”. Use that fear to drive you forward. Screw the excuses! Just do it and envision yourself doing what you think you can’t.
So, you’ve identified some Why’s of seeking a fitter you. Start a journal. Write down and reassess your efforts every week or month if you are too busy- just be consistent. Doing this will force you to acknowledge what you HAVE or HAVE NOT attempted. There’s no exact science. Until you can find your sweet spot remember: “un-intelligent motion is better than intelligent sitting still” [Thanks Dad!].
Small goals discourage immediate defeat! I couldn’t power jump, push up, or burpee well into the second month of Insanity. My only goal was to finish one workout at a time.
Small goals are subjective depending on your larger goal, but can look something like this:
- Daily 10-15 minute walk – the fresh air can inspire you to move!
- Try a new class format (yoga/spin/home workout program/boxing)
- Try a new recipe / food type
- Go to bed early
- Read 10 minutes a day
- Drinking 68 oz. water
All of these small goals can make a big difference. If creating a goal list doesn’t seem to work, share with someone really close to you what your goals are. And not just a random friend, choose someone you respect & admire that would crush you to disappoint them.
Also, saying your goals out loud will make it real. If you didn’t say it out loud it's easy to pretend like it didn't happen. Instead, reinforce your commitment loud and proud! Don't let yourself or your accountability partner down by holding it all in.
3. PERSONAL DEVELOPMENT
This is something I wish I took more seriously early on. Not only does it help you create a path to follow, it also provides some much-needed therapy during tough times. Once I committed to it, I found there was a ton of self-doubt, insecurity, lack of courage and confidence hiding beneath all of the things I should’ve left at the door ages ago.
I can’t stress enough the importance of letting go of the past in order to achieve fitness goals. Holding on to emotional baggage prevents growth, commitment, and self-dependency. Fitness is more than clocking hours on the pavement or in the kitchen. That muscle between your ears needs attention too and it’s time to work–that-shit-out.
Invest time in yourself to learn something new. There are books, e-books, podcasts, books on CD, and plenty of educational documentaries on streaming sites like Netflix to listen to and watch – hell, even learn a new language- anything you can get your hands on to improve your brain and outlook. Don’t think you have time? If you commute, you have time. If you post up on social media every five minutes, you have time. There are really no excuses.
My favorite podcast is The School of Greatness by Lewis Howes. He interviews the most successful entrepreneur’s across all industries. It’s literally a free education and inspires me to pay attention to my mind and to keep it open.
This is something I wish I took more seriously early on. Not only does it help you create a path to follow, it also provides some much-needed therapy during tough times. Once I committed to it, I found there was a ton of self-doubt, insecurity, lack of courage and confidence hiding beneath all of the things I should’ve left at the door ages ago.
I can’t stress enough the importance of letting go of the past in order to achieve fitness goals. Holding on to emotional baggage prevents growth, commitment, and self-dependency. Fitness is more than clocking hours on the pavement or in the kitchen. That muscle between your ears needs attention too and it’s time to work–that-shit-out.
Invest time in yourself to learn something new. There are books, e-books, podcasts, books on CD, and plenty of educational documentaries on streaming sites like Netflix to listen to and watch – hell, even learn a new language- anything you can get your hands on to improve your brain and outlook. Don’t think you have time? If you commute, you have time. If you post up on social media every five minutes, you have time. There are really no excuses.
My favorite podcast is The School of Greatness by Lewis Howes. He interviews the most successful entrepreneur’s across all industries. It’s literally a free education and inspires me to pay attention to my mind and to keep it open.
4. SELF LOVE
I am in love with self-love. It’s the SHIT! A little narcissism can fuel a lot of change. Self-love is the only reason you’ve read this far down and want to know how to make a change in yourself. Repeat after me: there is absolutely nothing wrong with that!
Who do you really want to be? If your self-view and life actions don’t line up with this answer then fitness goals may frustrate you easily. You may be that person who often makes excuses, blames others, is “too tired”, “too depressed”, acts the victim, or gives up with “I can’t” excuse too often.
This negativity impacts the support group and relationships you need to develop to help you reach fitness goals. You limit your options to attract the types of people you want to be around, be with the person you desire, or make people who depend on you happy unless you learn to love the living fuck out of yourself. Flaws and all.
Fall in love with every bit of what has made you who you are. Make peace with your past, shed any negative talk, and accept the mistakes you’ve made (but damn well learn from them). Also, know you will make mistakes again – it’s inevitable. Accept the things that make you unique: a big nose, lanky height, thick middle, big ass, small chest, a late bloomer…whatever it is. You are BEAUTIFUL!
True self-love is the opposite of insecurity. You can tell when someone is cool in their skin. Look for it next time you are in a large group. Their confidence exudes and they shine. We emanate towards those people. Be that person!
I am in love with self-love. It’s the SHIT! A little narcissism can fuel a lot of change. Self-love is the only reason you’ve read this far down and want to know how to make a change in yourself. Repeat after me: there is absolutely nothing wrong with that!
Who do you really want to be? If your self-view and life actions don’t line up with this answer then fitness goals may frustrate you easily. You may be that person who often makes excuses, blames others, is “too tired”, “too depressed”, acts the victim, or gives up with “I can’t” excuse too often.
This negativity impacts the support group and relationships you need to develop to help you reach fitness goals. You limit your options to attract the types of people you want to be around, be with the person you desire, or make people who depend on you happy unless you learn to love the living fuck out of yourself. Flaws and all.
Fall in love with every bit of what has made you who you are. Make peace with your past, shed any negative talk, and accept the mistakes you’ve made (but damn well learn from them). Also, know you will make mistakes again – it’s inevitable. Accept the things that make you unique: a big nose, lanky height, thick middle, big ass, small chest, a late bloomer…whatever it is. You are BEAUTIFUL!
True self-love is the opposite of insecurity. You can tell when someone is cool in their skin. Look for it next time you are in a large group. Their confidence exudes and they shine. We emanate towards those people. Be that person!
5. CELEBRATE!
Celebrate the small wins that make you feel victorious, the big feelings of accomplishment, and all things you’ve learned in between. Serious growth and change can be a grind. But, when you show up you damn-well deserve recognition!
Be thoughtful about how you want to recognize how far you’ve come and in what form will continue to keep you motivated. There are so many ways to do this, but in general, it's important to reevaluate if you’ve met your target goals at the end of every week or month (just remember, be consistent) and don’t feel guilty about spoiling yourself a little when you beat those goals. The reward should be an incentive and make the accomplishments all the sweeter!
Personally, I’ve bribed myself with the following:
Celebrate the small wins that make you feel victorious, the big feelings of accomplishment, and all things you’ve learned in between. Serious growth and change can be a grind. But, when you show up you damn-well deserve recognition!
Be thoughtful about how you want to recognize how far you’ve come and in what form will continue to keep you motivated. There are so many ways to do this, but in general, it's important to reevaluate if you’ve met your target goals at the end of every week or month (just remember, be consistent) and don’t feel guilty about spoiling yourself a little when you beat those goals. The reward should be an incentive and make the accomplishments all the sweeter!
Personally, I’ve bribed myself with the following:
- A new piece of clothing / shoes
- Girls/Guys night out
- A Cheat Meal
- Bottle of champagne
- Décor for your home
- Small tech item
- Plan a trip or weekend getaway
If you are like most of us trying to balance careers, relationships, health, finances and everything else- time is valuable. But, you want to overcome. Wreck some goals. Leave your mark. And as a bonus, to have a hell of a good time doing it! So committing to YOU shouldn’t feel like a chore. You deserve it. Everything you need is already inside you. Just peel back those layers, get off your ass and GO!
Coaching is my thing: marathon training, lifting your heaviest weight, to embracing all sorts of crazy change -- all while encouraging a life that feels good from the inside out. It seems like it would take an army, but it doesn’t have too! I love to support and show others it can be done daily and I’d love to work with you if you’re just starting out, need a push past the finish or are somewhere in between. Online support is the most convenient, but for those who need the face to face action - I host classes and training monthly. Get in touch!
Love, Lucia
*Thanks to the following people who inspire me: My Dad, Chalene Johnson, Simon Sinek and Runners United NYC
Coaching is my thing: marathon training, lifting your heaviest weight, to embracing all sorts of crazy change -- all while encouraging a life that feels good from the inside out. It seems like it would take an army, but it doesn’t have too! I love to support and show others it can be done daily and I’d love to work with you if you’re just starting out, need a push past the finish or are somewhere in between. Online support is the most convenient, but for those who need the face to face action - I host classes and training monthly. Get in touch!
Love, Lucia
*Thanks to the following people who inspire me: My Dad, Chalene Johnson, Simon Sinek and Runners United NYC
